and then I laughed at myself

I've talked before how I have struggled with being a perfectionist in the past. I determined a month or so ago to try and let it go. This has done wonders for my stress level and last night I hit a new milestone of non-perfectionism.

I have stage fright. Not because I'm scared of being in front of people...I'm scared of making mistakes in front of people. I hate speeches, presentations, and most of all...singing.

Don't get me wrong, I have a pretty decent voice. That's the problem. I want it to be perfect. So it doesn't matter the audience: the judges at choral contests, the audience at high school concerts, the rest of the choir at church, or even singing to the radio in the car with friends...I don't like doing it. Until last night...for once, I didn't feel the slightest twinge of fear. Friends and I were playing the ohsofun RockBand and when a fourth person came over, someone had to do vocals for us all to play together. No one else would do it. So I figured what the hell, I could just hum along and it would still work. I ended up singing my heart out, half the time off key and squeaky (Have YOU ever tried to sing Ballroom Blitz? I rest my case) and I HAD A BLAST. I didn't care that I was terrible. It was so much fun! Afterwards, everyone started singing and we were ALL godawful! Granted, if I had to sing in front of an audience and do something professionally, I would probably practice my heart out but I've determined that it really doesn't matter. Who cares if you totally botch something? It's not the end of the world. You may give someone else a chuckle or inspire them to equally botch something else.

In semi-related news, I got my grades today and I got straight As...with the exception of a B in that class I decided I was okay being less than perfect at. I love my B.