It's been...fun?

For about 6 months, I'd seriously considered getting back into the dating thing. Since my divorce, I've seen a few people and briefly tried an online matchmaking thing (a good friend met her 'soulmate' there and is determined that it would work for me). The whole endeavor left me perplexed. I don't remember dating being this stupid before. There seems to be an overabundance of mind games and extreme contrasts in neediness. The younger men want no-strings attached and the older ones are looking to get married in 6 months. I've become more than a little cynical.

Talking to my aforementioned friend, she's convinced that the man of my dreams is just around the corner. If I just keep looking, she's sure I'll find him. I remain wholly unconvinced. Granted, I see where she's coming from. She speaks with the voice of someone who is zealously in love. My voice of reason does little to pierce her armor. I know myself. I know I'm a difficult person. I know that it will take an insanely incredible person to be able to put up with me. I know they may not exist.

I've decided that for now, I'm better off alone. My friend thinks I'm being defeatist and depressing. I see it completely different. I get to enjoy my time by myself. I get to figure out what I really want out of life. I get to make decisions without considering how they may affect other people. There is so much I still have to learn about myself. I've been through a lot in the last couple years and I don't think another person could fully appreciate it.

So Dating, it was nice seeing you again. You've changed a bit but I'll try not to hold it against you. Perhaps in a year or two we can talk again. But for the love of god, don't call me, I'll call you.